I often feel like my life is spinning out of control.
Between two babies, a dog that sheds enough for an entire pack, a husband who commutes three hours a day, plus my compulsive desire to have a home that Martha would approve of, I frequently fantasize about not sleeping and getting a full 24 hours to do EVERYTHING THAT I NEED TO AND WANT TO. I think want is the key word there.
The fact is that I can't and I shouldn't, but it doesn't help me get everything done. Life is just like that.
I stumbled on another blog today -- Dogs Steal Yarn -- the May 19 post -- and got the karmic thump on the head. I do believe that there is some Higher Power out there. My term for it is The Infinite Yes. I am a semi-practicing Very Bad Catholic. That whole free will thing often puts me at odds with the human construct that is the Church. But Mass is a meditative, slightly rote experience for me that I find allows me to slip into myself. I think I would enjoy it so much more if Vatican II hadn't ruined everything. I miss the old hymns, but that is another story.
A dear friend, YB, will chide me when I start to get out of control. "Give it to God," she reminds. And the post I read this morning reminded me again. Most things are beyond my control for a reason. Control is not what life is about, experience is. Love is. Learning is. Teaching is.
So I put my thanks out there -- into the ether -- and hope that this post inspires a sense of peace in others the way another's post did me.